Practice: Pair Programming

[Kent Beck]

Write all production programs with two people sitting at one machine.
Set up the machine so the partners can sit comfortably side-by-side.
Move the keyboard and mouse back and forth so you are comfortable while
you are typing. Pair programming is a dialog between two people
simultaneously programming (and analyzing and designing and testing) and
trying to program better.

Pair programmers:
* Keep each other on task.
* Brainstorm refinements to the system.
* Clarify ideas.
* Take initiative when their partner is stuck, thus lower frustration.
* Hold each other accountable to the team's practices.

Pairing doesn't mean that you can't think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. If you need to work on an idea alone, go do
it. Then come back and check in with your team. You can even prototype
alone and still respect pairing. However, this is not an excuse to act
outside of the team. When you're done exploring bring the resulting
idea, not the code, back to the team. With a partner, you'll reimplement
it quickly. The results will be more widely understood, benefitting the
project as a whole.

Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers can't take
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like that,
they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from work. I keep a bottle of
water beside me while I pair. It's good for my health and I'm eventually
reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me fresh for the whole day.
Rotate pairs frequently. Some teams report good results obeying a timer
that tells them to shift partners every 60 minutes (every 30 minutes
when solving difficult problems). I don't think I'd like this, but I
haven't tried it. I like to program with someone new every couple of
hours, switching at natural breaks in development.

Pairing and Personal Space

An issue that has come up and requires comment is the close contact in
pair programming. Different individuals and cultures are comfortable
with different amounts of body space. Pairing with an Italian is
completely different than pairing with a Dane. If you aren't aware of
the difference it can be acutely uncomfortable. Personal space must be
respected for both parties to work well.

Personal hygiene and health are important issues when pairing. Cover
your mouth when you cough. Don't come to work when you are sick. Avoid
strong colognes that might affect your partner.

Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new experience in
the workplace for some. When programmers aren't emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a person of the
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in the best
interest of the team. If these feelings arise when pairing, stop pairing
with the person until you have taken responsibility for and dealt with
your feelings. Even if the feelings are mutual, acting on them will hurt
the team. If you want to have an intimate relationship, one of you
should leave the team so you can build a personal relationship in a
personal setting without confusing the team's communication with a
sexual subtext. Ideally, emotions at work will be about work.

It is important to respect individual differences when pairing. In
Figure 5 the man has moved closer to the woman than is comfortable for
her. Neither is making his or her best technical decisions at this
point, although they may be completely unaware of the source of their
discomfort.


Figure 5: Personal space and pairing

If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team, talk about it
with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager, or someone in
human resources. If you aren't comfortable, the team isn't doing as well
as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.

[William Pietri]

Hi, Kent. I think this is generally a good summary of pair programming.
I'm not sure of the context of this piece, but if it's all people read
on pairing, I'd add more about what people actually do when they are at
the keyboard and when the aren't.

Pairing doesn’t mean that you can’t think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. [...] When you’re done exploring bring the
resulting idea, not the code, back to the team.

I think this is a great paragraph; it's something people don't
understand about pairing at first, and this really clears it up.

Personal hygiene and health are important issues when pairing. Cover
your mouth when you cough. Don’t come to work when you are sick. Avoid
strong colognes that might affect your partner.

I like to put pump containers of hand sanitizer near the pairing
stations.

Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new experience in
the workplace for some. When programmers aren’t emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a person of the
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in the best
interest of the team.

When I read this in the preprint, I wondered if this paragraph really
belonged in here. This strikes me as a potential problem in any team
situation, and it seems odd to me to suggest that Pair Programming is
particularly riskier than any other team activity. My fear is not only
that people will get the wrong idea about XP, but also people with a
bias against XP will use this paragraph to fight against an XP adoption.

If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team, talk about
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager, or someone
in human resources. If you aren’t comfortable, the team isn’t doing as
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.

I'd also add that it's worth talking with the team member with whom one
is uncomfortable.

William



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[Kent Beck]

I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the
workplace, and pairing provided a convenient place to put the
discussion. XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of
sexuality in the workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the
problem: two people, physical proximity, shared success. Unfortunately,
Prof. Williams' book ignores the issue altogether.

I agree that people could use this paragraph as an excuse to dismiss XP,
but in the past five years I've seen much more inventive ways of
dismissing XP. On balance, I think the book is more valuable to XP by
addressing the issue head on. Leaving it out won't prevent criticism and
putting it in encourages team members to improve their collective
performance by tackling the problem.

Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Monday, November 08, 2004 12:13 PM
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming

Post by Kent Beck
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new

experience in

Post by Kent Beck
the workplace for some. When programmers aren't emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a

person of the

Post by Kent Beck
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not

in the best

Post by Kent Beck
interest of the team.

When I read this in the preprint, I wondered if this paragraph really
belonged in here. This strikes me as a potential problem in any team
situation, and it seems odd to me to suggest that Pair Programming is
particularly riskier than any other team activity. My fear is not only
that people will get the wrong idea about XP, but also people with a
bias against XP will use this paragraph to fight against an XP
adoption.

Post by Kent Beck
If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team,

talk about

Post by Kent Beck
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager,

or someone

Post by Kent Beck
in human resources. If you aren't comfortable, the team

isn't doing as

Post by Kent Beck
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.

I'd also add that it's worth talking with the team member with whom
one is uncomfortable.

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[Nigel Thorne]

If you feel the topic is sufficiently important to mention, then
shouldn't it have its own section? I feel grouping it with pairing
clouds the point you are making about pairing.

IMHO the pair programming section should cover "what is it?", and "why do it?".

I would introduce a separate section to cover the social aspects that
relate to working closely with others in a team, It could contain all
the 'make sure you don't smell', 'respect other peoples opinions and
rights', 'communicate in a non-threaterning tone', etc... issues.

Just my thoughts,

Nigel Thorne

Post by Kent Beck
I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the
workplace, and pairing provided a convenient place to put the
discussion. XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of
sexuality in the workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the
problem: two people, physical proximity, shared success. Unfortunately,
Prof. Williams' book ignores the issue altogether.
I agree that people could use this paragraph as an excuse to dismiss XP,
but in the past five years I've seen much more inventive ways of
dismissing XP. On balance, I think the book is more valuable to XP by
addressing the issue head on. Leaving it out won't prevent criticism and
putting it in encourages team members to improve their collective
performance by tackling the problem.
Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Monday, November 08, 2004 12:13 PM
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming

Post by Kent Beck
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new

experience in

Post by Kent Beck
the workplace for some. When programmers aren't emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a

person of the

Post by Kent Beck
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not

in the best

Post by Kent Beck
interest of the team.

When I read this in the preprint, I wondered if this paragraph really
belonged in here. This strikes me as a potential problem in any team
situation, and it seems odd to me to suggest that Pair Programming is
particularly riskier than any other team activity. My fear is not only
that people will get the wrong idea about XP, but also people with a
bias against XP will use this paragraph to fight against an XP adoption.

Post by Kent Beck
If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team,

talk about

Post by Kent Beck
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager,

or someone

Post by Kent Beck
in human resources. If you aren't comfortable, the team

isn't doing as

Post by Kent Beck
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.

I'd also add that it's worth talking with the team member with whom
one is uncomfortable.

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[utahkay]

Post by Kent Beck
I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the
workplace,

Can you tell me more about why it's valuable that XP address this
problem? Should XP address other problems in the workplace, such as
violence, substance abuse, embezzlement, ... Help me understand why
sex should be singled out and addressed by a methodology book.

Post by Kent Beck
and pairing provided a convenient place to put the
discussion.

I can't speak to what may or may not be convenient for the author, but
as a reader I find this tiny "tip of the iceberg" dropped in amongst
pair programming to be very distracting from the topic of pair
programming.

Post by Kent Beck
I agree that people could use this paragraph as an excuse to dismiss XP,
but in the past five years I've seen much more inventive ways of
dismissing XP. On balance, I think the book is more valuable to XP by
addressing the issue head on. Leaving it out won't prevent criticism and
putting it in encourages team members to improve their collective
performance by tackling the problem.

Other things improve collective team performance. Prayer. Good health
and enough sleep. Therapy. At what point do I stop looking to my
methodology for advice and start looking to my family/spiritual
advisor/therapist for support? The issue of sex in the workplace, and
the related issue of mixed genders in the workplace, not to mention
religious freedom and a host of other concerns, are issues I'd prefer
to address in other contexts.

-Kay





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[Chris Wheeler]

Hi Kay,

I can't agree with you more.

Lately, I've seen some examples of XP luminaries,
dispensing advice that really has nothing to do with
XP, but is made to sound as though it does (from my
perspective, at least). I have tried to disentangle
the way I feel about getting this type of advice -
direct or indirect - from XP luminaries. I'm talking
about things like what it means to live a truly
balanced life, how to feel towards people, what should
motivate me, etc. Here's what I've come up with:

* I feel amused. There's just something funny about
hearing these things talked about within the context
of programming.

* I feel naive. Are things like this really
happening, and am just too ignorant to see them?

* I feel condescended to. My experience is that
luminaries in any field eventually begin to dispense
advice about things that they have no business or
qualification dispensing advice about. I'm not saying
that is what happened here, but it is suspiciously
similar and invokes the similar feelings.

* I feel like a loser, I feel judged. If I'm not
working out at the gym, or I'm working past 5PM, or I
enjoy playing video games and chatting online,
according to some luminaries, I'm not leading a
balanced life, and need to get out more.

* I feel like I'm an idiot. After all, what kind of
an idiot wouldn't already know the very simple rules
explained here?

* I feel dismissive. Once I start to hear advice like
this dispensed from people who I feel aren't qualified
to give it, then I usually start to dismiss all the
good advice that they actually give.

Once again, these are my feelings, not right, not
wrong, just complicated, like anyone elses.

I think that the best advice about XP and life came
from Phlip. He said, "XP is a handful of books on how
to program. Don't worship it."

I tend to agree.

Chris.

--- utahkay <kay-5ustyahknYQdnm+***@public.gmane.org> wrote:
<--- A lot of things that I totally agree with, but
summed up as --->

Post by utahkay
The issue of sex in
the workplace, and
the related issue of mixed genders in the workplace,
not to mention
religious freedom and a host of other concerns, are
issues I'd prefer
to address in other contexts.
-Kay

=====
---------------------------
C H R I S W H E E L E R
Extreme Programmer & Coach

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[Ron Jeffries]

I feel free to talk about whatever's on my mind. I don't speak for XP, I
speak for Ron Jeffries, for XProgramming.com, and occasionally, for
Boskone.

I say things that are sometimes pragmatic, sometimes profound, very
occasionally witty, often stupid, frequently challenging, and more often
than I would like, just plain wrong.

I intend to continue to do that as long as I'm able. I would invite people
to listen to the ideas, not the name of the author.

Additional comments interleaved below.

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
Comments lie. Code doesn't.

Post by Chris Wheeler
Lately, I've seen some examples of XP luminaries,
dispensing advice that really has nothing to do with
XP, but is made to sound as though it does (from my
perspective, at least). I have tried to disentangle
the way I feel about getting this type of advice -
direct or indirect - from XP luminaries. I'm talking
about things like what it means to live a truly
balanced life, how to feel towards people, what should
* I feel amused. There's just something funny about
hearing these things talked about within the context
of programming.

Well, let it be funny. I think a lot about my life, what's good about it
and what's not so good. I feel that there is value in reflecting on such
things, so I share my reflections in the hope that they will be useful. If
all they do is serve to amuse, that's good, amusement is good for people.
If they cause someone to think a new thought, that's even better.

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel naive. Are things like this really
happening, and am just too ignorant to see them?

Things like what?

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel condescended to. My experience is that
luminaries in any field eventually begin to dispense
advice about things that they have no business or
qualification dispensing advice about. I'm not saying
that is what happened here, but it is suspiciously
similar and invokes the similar feelings.

Yes. I think about a lot of things and talk about them all, because it
helps me understand, and because I feel that ideas are always helpful one
way or another. I claim almost no qualification whatsoever for my advice:
it comes from my experience and so far I'm still alive. Beyond that, take
it for what you paid for it.

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel like a loser, I feel judged. If I'm not
working out at the gym, or I'm working past 5PM, or I
enjoy playing video games and chatting online,
according to some luminaries, I'm not leading a
balanced life, and need to get out more.

I am a fat old man who eats too much, does too little exercise, spends his
money on the wrong things, wastes way too much time reading email and
chatting on line. Once in a while I do something a little more right than
that.

I hope that makes you feel less like a loser. I don't even know what you
are up to, so I'm in no position to judge you. If you write something, as
you just did, I will think about that and reflect back what I thought.
That's not judgment, it's reflection and conversation. Even if by chance I
should happen not to agree. (At the moment, I feel like I'm mostly
agreeing, in case that wasn't clear.)

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel like I'm an idiot. After all, what kind of
an idiot wouldn't already know the very simple rules
explained here?

All of us are idiots and don't do things that we should. Simplicity is very
very difficult, as some of my sigs suggest. My guess is that feeling like
an idiot is a precursor to learning. I hope so, anyway, since I feel that
way a lot.

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel dismissive. Once I start to hear advice like
this dispensed from people who I feel aren't qualified
to give it, then I usually start to dismiss all the
good advice that they actually give.

That's OK. There's lots of information out there, and we have to filter it
somehow. I try to filter it by thinking about it, but sometimes when it
hits me sufficiently wrongly, I can't take it in.

Post by Chris Wheeler
Once again, these are my feelings, not right, not
wrong, just complicated, like anyone elses.

Yep, just like and just as good.

Post by Chris Wheeler
I think that the best advice about XP and life came
from Phlip. He said, "XP is a handful of books on how
to program. Don't worship it."
I tend to agree.

It's one of the best things Phlip has ever said. And one of the clearest.
Go for it!

End quotation from Chris Wheeler, on Friday, November 12, 2004, at 8:09:35 PM




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[Chris Wheeler]

Hi Ron,et al.

I may have been a bit confusing... I don't always feel
all those things... For instance, I don't generally
feel I'm a loser :) These were the feelings that I
have had, some stronger than others, when I've had
occasion to read or receive some things that I have
perceived as advice that drifts afield of XP from XP
experts.

That said, regardless of what I feel, I always learn
something. Something about myself (like why did I
react that way?), something about how others may feel.
I think these make a better coach and human.

And of course, that sounds like I am negating what I
just said about receiving advice. Oh well. I'm
human, and naturally nondeterministic.

Rest of my remarks are inline.

Chris.

Post by Ron Jeffries

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel naive. Are things like this really
happening, and am just too ignorant to see them?

Things like what?

Sorry, things like what Kent said about intimate
feelings while pairing, others saying that a lot of
programmers live unbalanced lives, etc.

Post by Ron Jeffries

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel like a loser, I feel judged. If I'm not
working out at the gym, or I'm working past 5PM,

or I

Post by Chris Wheeler
enjoy playing video games and chatting online,
according to some luminaries, I'm not leading a
balanced life, and need to get out more.

I am a fat old man who eats too much, does too
...
I hope that makes you feel less like a loser.

I'd lie if I said I never compare myself to others.
And as I said, this isn't my normal predisposition.

The times I've felt that way (and it's a mild
feeling)is when I've received advice in the form of
'The best people I know do X' or 'When I was at the
gym, I was thinking, most programmers don't even
venture out of doors...' - both implying (with some
truth) that I never do X, or go outside, etc.

This passes though, because I have decent self-esteem,
and typically know pretty much what I need to improve
(even if I don't do it).

I
<(At the moment, I feel

Post by Ron Jeffries
like I'm mostly
agreeing, in case that wasn't clear.)

Clear.

Post by Ron Jeffries

Post by Chris Wheeler
* I feel like I'm an idiot.

All of us are idiots and don't do things that we
should.
My guess is that feeling like an idiot is a
precursor to learning. I hope so,
anyway, since I feel that
way a lot.

Completely agree. For instance, one thing that I've
learned is that I know what kind of communication
causes me to shut out some learning. Knowing this
will hopefully make me a better coach when I have to
bring up more challenging ideas.

So, I guess I learned something from Kent's now famous
paragraphs... Though probably not the thing he
intended.

Chris.

=====
---------------------------
C H R I S W H E E L E R
Extreme Programmer & Coach



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[Dale Emery]

Hi Chris,

These were the feelings that I have had, some stronger than
others, when I've had occasion to read or receive some things
that I have perceived as advice that drifts afield of XP from
XP experts.

If you thought the XP experts were also experts in the other
things they're advising about, would you feel differently?

Dale
--
Dale Emery, Consultant
Collaborative Leadership for Software People
Web: http://www.dhemery.com
Weblog: http://www.dhemery.com/cwd

When your argument has little or no substance, abuse your
opponent. --Cicero



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[Chris Wheeler]

Post by Dale Emery
If you thought the XP experts were also experts in
the other
things they're advising about, would you feel
differently?

Dale, if you'd asked me this an hour or two ago, the
answer would have been yes. Now I think my views on
this are changing. Maybe my other posts will explain
it better.

Chris.


=====
---------------------------
C H R I S W H E E L E R
Extreme Programmer & Coach



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[William Pietri]

Hi, Ron! I don't wish to deny you your right to say whatever pleases
you. And I certainly enjoy your posts, on topic and off. However, I am
compelled to contradict you on something.

I feel free to talk about whatever's on my mind. I don't speak for XP, [...]

When you and Kent write in places like the Extreme Programming mailing
lists and the Extreme Programming books, you are seen by many as
speaking for XP, or at least authoritatively about it. I imagine that
having ex cathedra powers is not something that you entirely enjoy, but
I think you have them, especially for people outside the community.

And I think that's why we're taking these paragraphs more seriously than
we would if they were written by somebody else or somewhere else.
Personally, having met and corresponded with you guys for years, I can
generally separate the personal opinions from the official ones.
(Although not always; I'm still wondering whether sexual harassment is a
bigger problem on XP teams than others, as I inferred from this
section.)

Others, however, will read this as Kent Beck, the Father of Extreme
Programming, saying in the One True XP Book that sexual attraction is a
relatively serious problem when pairing, at least for heterosexuals. Now
that may be accurate, and regardless, as you point out, it's Kent's book
to write. But for those of us who work in the penumbra of his power,
what he writes is of concern.

William

[Ron Jeffries]

(Women: go with me here for a minute, please. I need a very casual phrase
meaning "just some person". In this little article, I'm using the phrase
"just some guy" to mean that. I'm not excluding you. In this article,
you're just some guy too. I apologize for the apparent insult and
specifically exclude it from what I'm getting at here.)

William, I agree that Kent is "seen by many", and perhaps even I am "seen
by not so many" as having some kind of authority. That's something of which
I hope we are always mindful, but at the same time it's just not true.

Kent Beck is just some guy. Ron Jeffries is just some guy. They weren't
granted special authority by any divine agency, though they were both
blessed with a little talent, some great teachers, and some great learning
experiences, which pounded a couple of useful ideas into their heads.

They have spent a lot of time thinking about things, and a lot of time
honing their ability to express the things they value in ways that might
best help other people benefit from what they think.

Gandhi, the Queen, the Pope, the President, it doesn't matter. Just some
guy. Maybe a very thoughtful one, maybe a very wise one, but still just a
plain old working, thinking, fallible human like you and me. If people
think otherwise, they're mistaken.

Frankly I think the world would be a better place if we listened to
everyone with the same care and intensity that we listen to the most
"authoritative" person we know.

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
Wisdom begins when we discover the difference between
"That makes no sense" and "I don't understand". --Mary Doria Russell

Post by William Pietri
Hi, Ron! I don't wish to deny you your right to say whatever pleases
you. And I certainly enjoy your posts, on topic and off. However, I am
compelled to contradict you on something.

I feel free to talk about whatever's on my mind. I don't speak for XP, [...]

When you and Kent write in places like the Extreme Programming mailing
lists and the Extreme Programming books, you are seen by many as
speaking for XP, or at least authoritatively about it. I imagine that
having ex cathedra powers is not something that you entirely enjoy, but
I think you have them, especially for people outside the community.
And I think that's why we're taking these paragraphs more seriously than
we would if they were written by somebody else or somewhere else.
Personally, having met and corresponded with you guys for years, I can
generally separate the personal opinions from the official ones.
(Although not always; I'm still wondering whether sexual harassment is a
bigger problem on XP teams than others, as I inferred from this
section.)
Others, however, will read this as Kent Beck, the Father of Extreme
Programming, saying in the One True XP Book that sexual attraction is a
relatively serious problem when pairing, at least for heterosexuals. Now
that may be accurate, and regardless, as you point out, it's Kent's book
to write. But for those of us who work in the penumbra of his power,
what he writes is of concern.

End quotation from William Pietri, on Saturday, November 13, 2004, at 12:54:31 AM




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[Kent Beck]

William,

When I write a book about XP, I do represent XP. I accept responsibility
when I accept readers' money. When I talk on the web I am still accountable
for the things I say. People consider the source of material they read or
hear. I want to be a reliable source of useful information.

I try to take the task of communication seriously because I want to
communicate as clearly as I can. I want to speak clearly and directly from
my heart (a task that alas eludes me much of the time). I want to speak
about topics that I feel strongly about. I think that inappropriate
feelings, when they arise, are a serious problem for teams. I have seen it
happen often enough that I think I should write about it. The private
messages I've received about the topic confirm this observation.

Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Friday, November 12, 2004 9:55 PM
Practice: PairProgramming, Sex, etc]
Hi, Ron! I don't wish to deny you your right to say whatever pleases
you. And I certainly enjoy your posts, on topic and off. However, I am
compelled to contradict you on something.

Post by Ron Jeffries
I feel free to talk about whatever's on my mind. I don't

speak for XP,

Post by Ron Jeffries
[...]

When you and Kent write in places like the Extreme Programming mailing
lists and the Extreme Programming books, you are seen by many as
speaking for XP, or at least authoritatively about it. I imagine that
having ex cathedra powers is not something that you entirely enjoy,
but I think you have them, especially for people outside the
community.
And I think that's why we're taking these paragraphs more seriously
than we would if they were written by somebody else or somewhere else.
Personally, having met and corresponded with you guys for years, I can
generally separate the personal opinions from the official ones.
(Although not always; I'm still wondering whether sexual harassment is
a bigger problem on XP teams than others, as I inferred from this
section.)
Others, however, will read this as Kent Beck, the Father of Extreme
Programming, saying in the One True XP Book that sexual attraction is
a relatively serious problem when pairing, at least for heterosexuals.
Now that may be accurate, and regardless, as you point out, it's
Kent's book to write. But for those of us who work in the penumbra of
his power, what he writes is of concern.
William
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[Michael Feathers]

Post by Chris Wheeler
Hi Kay,
I can't agree with you more.
Lately, I've seen some examples of XP luminaries,
dispensing advice that really has nothing to do with
XP, but is made to sound as though it does (from my
perspective, at least). I have tried to disentangle
the way I feel about getting this type of advice -
direct or indirect - from XP luminaries. I'm talking
about things like what it means to live a truly
balanced life, how to feel towards people, what should
motivate me, etc.

Yeah, but I think that people in the the community have gotten back to
this in a common way. Alot of this is people work. Sit ten programmers
in a room who don't know how to act around each other and things usually
go to hell. Sit ten together that do and really cool things happen. I
was kind of shocked, when I started helping teams transition, to
discover just how people-y the work was, but I kind of accepted it. At
the end of all of this, you have tech people who have had to deal with a
lot of people problems. It isn't an expertise that comes from education
for the most part but it is something that people want to communicate.

I think the thing I always want to get back to is not how to feel about
people but what -do- people feel about people. And, not what should
motivate people, but rather what does motivate people. I think that the
agile community is at a bit of an impasse over this right now. Some
people are saying that they would like to talk about how they act in
situations so that they can offer that example to others who might want
to know. While I think that is valuable, I think that it also sidesteps
frank discussions about team dynamics, personal coping styles, what do
to when people aren't on-board, how to do quality work when you have to
deal with micro-managers, dealing with people who say they want to play
ball but don't, issues like the pairing thing, bad breath etc, which,
whether we like it or not, can affect whether we work well together or
not. I agree with Kay that religion is out of bounds, but thankfully
breath mints aren't. :)

Michael





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[Chris Wheeler]

Post by Michael Feathers
I
was kind of shocked, when I started helping teams
transition, to
discover just how people-y the work was, but I kind
of accepted it.

So was I, but I didn't accept it. I didn't start out
as a coach, but when I started learning XP, I slowly
(i'd like to say quickly, but, no, slowly) realised
that my personal style had to change. Mainly because
the coaches we hired kept pulling into rooms and
telling me this 'airy fairy' people and team nonsense,
and then pushed me back on the team and let me learn
that the people stuff was actually important.

Post by Michael Feathers
I think
that it also sidesteps
frank discussions about team dynamics, personal
coping styles,etc

I wish we had more discussions like this. Because,
for the most part, it's not technical issues that we
struggle with. It's interpersonal. Crap, see, I'm
coming to the realisation that within that past hour
or two, my views have changed around offering advice,
per my original post. And it's because of talking it
out with a few of you.

That's the stuff I want to talk about - like, why did
my views change like that? I'm sure it doesn't make
me wishy-washy, but I know that when I have changed my
mind in the past,I've felt that way. And I know
others feel like that too.

Does this happen to you guys?

Chris.



=====
---------------------------
C H R I S W H E E L E R
Extreme Programmer & Coach



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[Ron Jeffries]

I like talking about stuff, with passionate people, because it /always/
changes my mind. I like that.

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
The practices are not the knowing: they are a path to the knowing.

Post by Chris Wheeler
That's the stuff I want to talk about - like, why did
my views change like that? I'm sure it doesn't make
me wishy-washy, but I know that when I have changed my
mind in the past,I've felt that way. And I know
others feel like that too.

End quotation from Chris Wheeler, on Friday, November 12, 2004, at 9:41:05 PM




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[Zhon Johansen]

Hi Kent, you know I have the greatest respect for you. So I don't know
if my post stems from valor or foolishness. (My reviewer said, "I
admire your courage but not your wisdom.")

I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the workplace,

Companies take discrimination and harassment seriously. They have
training that takes hours and sometimes days. Policies are created to
mitigate these types of problems. Violation of these policies lead to
termination and lawsuits. IMO, two paragraphs are insufficient to cover
this topic.

and pairing provided a convenient place to put the discussion.

When I read the two sex tips paragraphs, I became angry and frustrated.
Why do I feel this way? Was it because I feel it distracts from the
goodness that is in Pair Programming and XP without offering any real
advice (stop pairing, talk to someone, masturbate:-) ). Or was it fear
of HR's XP sensitivity policies? Maybe it was it the missing advice for
dealing with inter-gender advances.

I still don't know how to feel. I take comfort knowing I am not alone;
XP Agile Universe had the "the sex chapter" buzz: "Was Kent involved
in a lawsuit?" "Is Kent saying women should not be on the team?" "Is
this a joke -- he had /Sex Tips for Girls/ in XPE?"

XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of sexuality in the workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the problem: two people, physical proximity, shared success.

XP can also mitigate such foolishness: working as a team, working with
different people every day, no two people working nights, all work is
done in an open space, spending more time with your family all without
an open discussion on sex.

I regret these two paragraphs in XPE 2nd Edition. I might regret this
post. On the other hand, I've enjoyed the learning and successes XP has
brought me these past five years and look forward to many more. Thank
you, Kent.

Sincerely,

Zhon Johansen


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[csteinbach2003]

Post by Zhon Johansen
I regret these two paragraphs in XPE 2nd Edition.

I have tried to form an opinion about all this.

There is something I find reassuring about confronting problems, and
I'm a born worrier so I need all the reassurance I can get. When I
was younger I had a special talent for forgetting homework. On the
journey to school my Mother would try to calm me, usually to no avail
with the knowledge that teachers are not monsters. Of course, I knew
otherwise. In the end she would ask, 'What is the worst thing they
could do to you?'. Having considered the point, the "worst thing"
became suddenly endurable.

And so it might be that potential newcomers to XP will feel more
comfortable with pair programming having learnt of this potentially
awkward circumstance. That said, mentioning the whole pair-orgy
affair does leave me with misgivings that I can't quite place.

I have encountered problems with pair-programming --nothing
insurmountable mind you. Pair competence mismatch and difficulties
speaking or understanding foreign languages come to mind. These
problems don't really compete with the one Kent has tackled for
unqualified oomph and fruitiness; on the other hand I suspect they are
more commonplace.

/Chris Steinbach





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[Michael Feathers]

I think Kent's wording is careful and good, however, I don't like the
advice as much. I'd recommend someone talk to a friend outside of work
first before talking to someone at work about it. That way, at least
they'd receive advice that isn't cloaked in "I feel I have to respond
this way because I'm part of the organization and responsible to it." I
think advice like that is good but it often isn't the kind of human or
personal advice that a person needs. When you add in the escalating
side-effects that can because of harrassment legal fears, I'd say
talking to someone outside the organisation first is a clear win.

To draw a parallel, remember the main character (Peter)'s next door
neighbor (Lawrence) in Office Space? Peter says "What would you say if
you someone said to you it looks like you have a case of the Mondays?"
I think we all need someone disinterested to talk to at times. It's
nice when we can have those conversations at work, but I suspect there
are many places where you can't have them constructively.

Michael





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[Lowell Lindstrom]

Zhon-

I certainly hope you don't regret the post. A dead fish should be
addressed. Your message resonated with me, as did Kay's.

Bringing developers together and having them collaborate will
trigger all sorts of interpersonal issues. It is good to see the
focus on them. That said...

I have yet to hear about sexual arrousal as an actual problem in any
of the teams with whom we've worked. This, of course, does not mean
it isn't there. It may be a dead whale that no one wants to
discuss, but I would suspect we would have seen it somewhere if it
were the primary concern when pairing.

In this description of pair programming, 20% of the words are
devoted to the sexual arrousal issue. For me, this is significantly
out of balance and disconnected from what is happening out there.
Ownership and recognition issues are much more accute and
detrimental to the team in my observation.

Are others seeing or sensing that this is a common problem that
warrants that level of treatment in the pair programming chapter?

Lowell

Post by Zhon Johansen
Hi Kent, you know I have the greatest respect for you. So I don't know
if my post stems from valor or foolishness. (My reviewer

said, "I

Post by Zhon Johansen
admire your courage but not your wisdom.")

I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the workplace,

Companies take discrimination and harassment seriously. They have
training that takes hours and sometimes days. Policies are

created to

Post by Zhon Johansen
mitigate these types of problems. Violation of these policies

lead to

Post by Zhon Johansen
termination and lawsuits. IMO, two paragraphs are insufficient to cover
this topic.

and pairing provided a convenient place to put the discussion.

When I read the two sex tips paragraphs, I became angry and

frustrated.

Post by Zhon Johansen
Why do I feel this way? Was it because I feel it distracts from the
goodness that is in Pair Programming and XP without offering any real
advice (stop pairing, talk to someone, masturbate:-) ). Or was it fear
of HR's XP sensitivity policies? Maybe it was it the missing

advice for

Post by Zhon Johansen
dealing with inter-gender advances.
I still don't know how to feel. I take comfort knowing I am not alone;
XP Agile Universe had the "the sex chapter" buzz: "Was Kent

involved

Post by Zhon Johansen
in a lawsuit?" "Is Kent saying women should not be on the

team?" "Is

Post by Zhon Johansen
this a joke -- he had /Sex Tips for Girls/ in XPE?"

XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of sexuality in

the workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the problem: two
people, physical proximity, shared success.

Post by Zhon Johansen
XP can also mitigate such foolishness: working as a team, working with
different people every day, no two people working nights, all work is
done in an open space, spending more time with your family all

without

Post by Zhon Johansen
an open discussion on sex.
I regret these two paragraphs in XPE 2nd Edition. I might regret this
post. On the other hand, I've enjoyed the learning and successes XP has
brought me these past five years and look forward to many more. Thank
you, Kent.
Sincerely,
Zhon Johansen

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[Clarke Ching]

I know this is a serious subject (snigger, snigger) but I wish I'd known all
of these sex things when I was young and allowed to do something about it.


_____

From: Lowell Lindstrom [mailto:lindstrom-***@public.gmane.org]
Sent: 12 November 2004 15:13
To: xpbookdiscussiongroup-***@public.gmane.org
Subject: [xpe2e] Re: Sex Tips for Promiscious Pairs (was Practice: Pair
Programming)



Zhon-

I certainly hope you don't regret the post. A dead fish should be
addressed. Your message resonated with me, as did Kay's.

Bringing developers together and having them collaborate will
trigger all sorts of interpersonal issues. It is good to see the
focus on them. That said...

I have yet to hear about sexual arrousal as an actual problem in any
of the teams with whom we've worked. This, of course, does not mean
it isn't there. It may be a dead whale that no one wants to
discuss, but I would suspect we would have seen it somewhere if it
were the primary concern when pairing.

In this description of pair programming, 20% of the words are
devoted to the sexual arrousal issue. For me, this is significantly
out of balance and disconnected from what is happening out there.
Ownership and recognition issues are much more accute and
detrimental to the team in my observation.

Are others seeing or sensing that this is a common problem that
warrants that level of treatment in the pair programming chapter?

Lowell

Post by Zhon Johansen
Hi Kent, you know I have the greatest respect for you. So I don't know
if my post stems from valor or foolishness. (My reviewer

said, "I

Post by Zhon Johansen
admire your courage but not your wisdom.")

I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the workplace,

Companies take discrimination and harassment seriously. They have
training that takes hours and sometimes days. Policies are

created to

Post by Zhon Johansen
mitigate these types of problems. Violation of these policies

lead to

Post by Zhon Johansen
termination and lawsuits. IMO, two paragraphs are insufficient to cover
this topic.

and pairing provided a convenient place to put the discussion.

When I read the two sex tips paragraphs, I became angry and

frustrated.

Post by Zhon Johansen
Why do I feel this way? Was it because I feel it distracts from the
goodness that is in Pair Programming and XP without offering any real
advice (stop pairing, talk to someone, masturbate:-) ). Or was it fear
of HR's XP sensitivity policies? Maybe it was it the missing

advice for

Post by Zhon Johansen
dealing with inter-gender advances.
I still don't know how to feel. I take comfort knowing I am not alone;
XP Agile Universe had the "the sex chapter" buzz: "Was Kent

involved

Post by Zhon Johansen
in a lawsuit?" "Is Kent saying women should not be on the

team?" "Is

Post by Zhon Johansen
this a joke -- he had /Sex Tips for Girls/ in XPE?"

XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of sexuality in

the workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the problem: two
people, physical proximity, shared success.

Post by Zhon Johansen
XP can also mitigate such foolishness: working as a team, working with
different people every day, no two people working nights, all work is
done in an open space, spending more time with your family all

without

Post by Zhon Johansen
an open discussion on sex.
I regret these two paragraphs in XPE 2nd Edition. I might regret this
post. On the other hand, I've enjoyed the learning and successes XP has
brought me these past five years and look forward to many more. Thank
you, Kent.
Sincerely,
Zhon Johansen

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[Doug Swartz]

Post by Lowell Lindstrom
In this description of pair programming, 20% of the words are
devoted to the sexual arrousal issue. For me, this is significantly
out of balance and disconnected from what is happening out there.
Ownership and recognition issues are much more accute and
detrimental to the team in my observation.
Are others seeing or sensing that this is a common problem that
warrants that level of treatment in the pair programming chapter?

Office romances and sexual politics can be a problem in any
team, with our without pair programming. We had a couple who
became enamored of each other while working on one of our
development teams. I don't know if pair programming together
helped kindle the romance more than working closely together
in another team setting would have. I know some other team
member were at least somewhat bothered by their behavior I
heard the comment "Get a hotel room" a couple of times from
other team members. The male member of the couple has moved
to another of our developer teams, and there seems to be less
of a problem now, even though the other team is only 50 feet
away.

On the other hand, this hasn't been a noticeable problem
among our other 30+ developers.

I share Kent's concern about sexual tension engendered by the
close physical proximity of pair programming, and I'm glad he
included a reference to it. Although it's not yet been a
problem for me personally, I don't think I'll point out that
paragraph to my wife. I don't know if Kent's solution is
practical, but it is a place to start.
--
Doug Swartz
daswartz-***@public.gmane.org



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[Amir Kolsky]

OK, I'm going out on a limb here.

I think that the sex ed paragraphs are invaluable.

I've been coaching by pairing for quite some time now. And sex has never
ever crossed my mind, even when I paired with women :-)...

However, I've noticed over the last week that I've made extra sure that I do
not cramp the personal space of either genderes... I keep evaluating the
comfort level of my partners..

So, Kent has a good point here, even if the message seems totally not PC,
it's a very important message. Actually, Kent made it in the most gentle of
manners.

Amir Kolsky
XP& Software



_____

From: Zhon Johansen [mailto:zhon-aS9lmoZGLiVWk0Htik3J/***@public.gmane.org]
Sent: Friday, November 12, 2004 6:45 AM
To: xpbookdiscussiongroup-***@public.gmane.org
Subject: [xpe2e] Re: Sex Tips for Promiscious Pairs (was Practice: Pair
Programming)


Hi Kent, you know I have the greatest respect for you. So I don't know
if my post stems from valor or foolishness. (My reviewer said, "I
admire your courage but not your wisdom.")

I wanted to address the issue of inappropriate feelings in the workplace,

Companies take discrimination and harassment seriously. They have
training that takes hours and sometimes days. Policies are created to
mitigate these types of problems. Violation of these policies lead to
termination and lawsuits. IMO, two paragraphs are insufficient to cover
this topic.

and pairing provided a convenient place to put the discussion.

When I read the two sex tips paragraphs, I became angry and frustrated.
Why do I feel this way? Was it because I feel it distracts from the
goodness that is in Pair Programming and XP without offering any real
advice (stop pairing, talk to someone, masturbate:-) ). Or was it fear
of HR's XP sensitivity policies? Maybe it was it the missing advice for
dealing with inter-gender advances.

I still don't know how to feel. I take comfort knowing I am not alone;
XP Agile Universe had the "the sex chapter" buzz: "Was Kent involved
in a lawsuit?" "Is Kent saying women should not be on the team?" "Is
this a joke -- he had /Sex Tips for Girls/ in XPE?"

XP and pair programming didn't create the problem of sexuality in the

workplace. Pairing, however, can accentuate the problem: two people,
physical proximity, shared success.
XP can also mitigate such foolishness: working as a team, working with
different people every day, no two people working nights, all work is
done in an open space, spending more time with your family all without
an open discussion on sex.

I regret these two paragraphs in XPE 2nd Edition. I might regret this
post. On the other hand, I've enjoyed the learning and successes XP has
brought me these past five years and look forward to many more. Thank
you, Kent.

Sincerely,

Zhon Johansen


Yahoo! Groups Sponsor

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[William E Caputo]

I wonder how much of the strong reaction to Kent's "sex tips" is itself
cultural...

Best,
Bill

William E. Caputo
ThoughtWorks, Inc.
http://www.williamcaputo.com
--------
"The user of social software is the group, not the individual." -- Clay
Shirky





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[csteinbach2003]

Post by Kent Beck
Pairing doesn't mean that you can't think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. If you need to work on an idea alone, go do
it.

I like that you say both are necessary. The book People Ware talks
about 'flow' rather than focus and how anything other than solitude
will disrupt flow. I don't think pairing is so much about flow as it
is about focus and neither is a substitute for the other. Ideas that
are not well formed or difficult to articulate are too easily
dismissed during a dialog. I always appreciate having some time to
myself to develop ideas at least to the point that they are
communicable. On the other hand, if I know roughly the direction
development is taking, then pairing provides the focus to explore that
direction thoroughly.

Post by Kent Beck
Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers can't take
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like that,
they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from work. I keep a

bottle of

Post by Kent Beck
water beside me while I pair. It's good for my health and I'm

eventually

Post by Kent Beck
reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me fresh for the whole day.

In Sweden they have, twice a day, something called 'fika' which is
essentially a communal coffee break. It is considered polite if not
mandatory to stay for at least a couple of minutes. It is said that
you can tell how healthy an Swedish organization is from its fika
discipline.

Post by Kent Beck
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new experience in
the workplace for some. When programmers aren't emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a person of the
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in the best
interest of the team.

...and the lunch table fell silent. Some subjects are serious enough
that they require a touch of humor to make them palatable. Speaking
of which, not being able to view Figure 5. is making my imagination
run wild.

/Chris Steinbach





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[C. Keith Ray]

Post by csteinbach2003
Ideas that
are not well formed or difficult to articulate are too easily
dismissed during a dialog

With practice, a dialog can actually help articulate ideas that are not well formed. It's a
practice of collaboration rather than competition... starting with not dismissing what your
pair partner says.







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[Ron Jeffries]

I suspect that a jazz band is often in communal flow. I suspect that pairs
attain a flow state as well.

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
This is how I develop software.
Take the parts that make sense to you.
Ignore the rest.

Post by csteinbach2003
I like that you say both are necessary. The book People Ware talks
about 'flow' rather than focus and how anything other than solitude
will disrupt flow. I don't think pairing is so much about flow as it
is about focus and neither is a substitute for the other. Ideas that
are not well formed or difficult to articulate are too easily
dismissed during a dialog. I always appreciate having some time to
myself to develop ideas at least to the point that they are
communicable. On the other hand, if I know roughly the direction
development is taking, then pairing provides the focus to explore that
direction thoroughly.

End quotation from csteinbach2003, on Tuesday, November 9, 2004, at 10:35:11 AM




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[Kent Beck]

Chris,

Thank you for your thoughtful note. Have you ever considered writing a
book?

Whether half-formed ideas are dismissed or not during dialog depends on
the level of trust and maturity in the relationship. There are some
people I'm comfortable with spewing my rawest ideas to and listening to
theirs. Over time we've learned to trust each other to come up with good
ideas, so the initial ideas don't have to be good. I definitely don't do
this with everyone, though.

Kent

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Tuesday, November 09, 2004 7:35 AM
Subject: [xpe2e] Re: Practice: Pair Programming
I like that you say both are necessary. The book People Ware
talks about 'flow' rather than focus and how anything other
than solitude will disrupt flow. I don't think pairing is so
much about flow as it is about focus and neither is a
substitute for the other. Ideas that are not well formed or
difficult to articulate are too easily dismissed during a
dialog. I always appreciate having some time to myself to
develop ideas at least to the point that they are
communicable. On the other hand, if I know roughly the
direction development is taking, then pairing provides the
focus to explore that direction thoroughly.

Post by Kent Beck
Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers can't

take

Post by Kent Beck
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like

that,

Post by Kent Beck
they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from work. I keep a

bottle of

Post by Kent Beck
water beside me while I pair. It's good for my health and I'm

eventually

Post by Kent Beck
reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me fresh for the whole

day.
In Sweden they have, twice a day, something called 'fika'
which is essentially a communal coffee break. It is
considered polite if not mandatory to stay for at least a
couple of minutes. It is said that you can tell how healthy
an Swedish organization is from its fika discipline.

Post by Kent Beck
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new experience

in

Post by Kent Beck
the workplace for some. When programmers aren't emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a person of

the

Post by Kent Beck
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in the

best

Post by Kent Beck
interest of the team.

...and the lunch table fell silent. Some subjects are
serious enough that they require a touch of humor to make
them palatable. Speaking of which, not being able to view
Figure 5. is making my imagination run wild.
/Chris Steinbach
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[csteinbach2003]

Post by Kent Beck
Thank you for your thoughtful note. Have you ever considered

writing a

Post by Kent Beck
book?

I considered drawing a cartoon for the afore mentioned figure 5. Alas
time and talent were against me and I only got as far as the caption
which reads, 'Pair programming: one machine, one keyboard, TWO
chairs'.

Post by Kent Beck
Whether half-formed ideas are dismissed or not during dialog

depends on

Post by Kent Beck
the level of trust and maturity in the relationship.

Having read the various responses to my comments on flow and focus, I
can imagine now how pairing might cover both. Whether or not there
are advantages to working alone, I believe it is time for a
reversal of values in our industry; that is to say, the ability to
work as part of a team ought to be valued over the ability to work
alone.

That doesn't mean that I would retract my statement about appreciating
the time I have to myself. I would only add that such enjoyment is
short lived. I recently moved from Sweden to Luxembourg, my
girlfriend moving a month ahead of me. After only a few days I was
acutely aware that time alone is best dealt out in small measures.
That could mean that time alone should be kept to a minimum. It might
also mean that time alone is like salt in a bread recipe; you don't
want much of it, but you miss it if it's not there.

/Chris





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[William Wake]

I suspect that pairs attain a flow state as well.

I also believe in pair flow. (And on the best days there is group flow as
well.) You get the loss of time sense, the focus on the task at hand, etc.
I've noticed the same thing when I teach and put people in pairs - it's a
lot harder to pull them back out than if they're doing an individual
activity.

--Bill Wake




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[Tim King]

Post by C. Keith Ray

Post by csteinbach2003
Ideas that
are not well formed or difficult to articulate are too easily
dismissed during a dialog

With practice, a dialog can actually help articulate ideas that are not well formed. It's a
practice of collaboration rather than competition... starting with not dismissing what your
pair partner says.

I really like the distinction between collaboration and competition. In
my experience, that distinction captures the essence of a successful
pairing more than all the buzzwords about "teamwork" and "team building."

I'm often reminded of _Drew Carey's Green Screen Show_ or its progeny
_Whose Line is it Anyway?_ These are improv shows; given a topic, the
comics must act out a bit on the fly, making it up as they go along. I
sometimes identify with the actors. The bit's going along, and suddenly
one of the actors says something that completely changes the direction.
For example:

A. As soon as we get across the river, the treasure is ours!

B. What shall we do?

A. Let's use this boat!

(The get in the boat and begin rowing across the river.)

B. Oh no! We're sinking!

At this point, I wonder what A is going to do now that his boat has been
sunk. The first thing he always does is to try desperately not to laugh.
Fortuntely, neither I nor the studio audience need to hold back. Then he
might do something like:

A. Good thing we wore our bathing suits!

(They shed their outer clothes, but B forgot his bathing suit.)

B. Oops! I think I forgot to wear my bathing suit!

In the middle of a bit, your teammate may throw you a curve, put a new
spin on where you thought the bit was going. But you can't fight it. You
have to go with it, allow your teammate to contribute, and to contribute
yourself. Improv only works in a collaborative relationship, not a
competitive one.


It's also like being in a jazz or rock band. Usually, the notes are not
written out ahead of time. Each musician at most has a fake sheet or
lead sheet, with lyrics (if any) and the chords that the band should be
playing at each point in the song. But within this very loose structure,
there's a lot of variation. Each musician brings his own personality to
the mix, making up what notes to play as he goes along. Often, the
musicians will take turns playing solos as the others back them up.

In any case, when you're playing in a jazz band, you have to pay
attention to what all the other musicians are playing and to complement
their work. You can't fight them, and you can't ignore them, or else the
song won't work. You must take turns doing solos. And even when you're
soloing, you have to listen to the other musicians, so that your solo
can complement their accompaniment as much as their work accompanies yours.

Post by C. Keith Ray
I suspect that a jazz band is often in communal flow. I suspect that pairs
attain a flow state as well.

There is certainly a state similar to flow when you're playing music.
It's often called "tightness" or "groove." (Being a musician as well as
a software engineer, I feel qualified to comment on this.) There's a
point at which you forget that you're playing an instrument or singing,
and you just let the music come out, together. It's an awesome
experience, something that a single musician, no matter how talented,
could ever reach by himself.

It also takes practice for a band to be able to reach this state
together. There's a certain drummer I play with--I've been playing bass
with him for many years. It's relatively easy, during a given practice
session, for us to synch up and reach a state where we're in a tight
groove, even as we go from song to song. Another drummer with whom I've
not had as much practice, we find it more difficult to groove together,
but it's getting easier.

I've experienced something similar in paired development. (Though I'm
not an expert, as are others on this list.) It takes practice to be able
to reach flow in a pair. But it seems to me that once we do, the
intensity of this flow is greater than either of us could experience on
his own.

-TimK


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[William Pietri]

Thanks for the excellent comparison, Tim. I thought I'd add one minor
thing.

Post by Tim King
Improv only works in a collaborative relationship, not a
competitive one.

Having done some improvisational theater, I think that's not quite
right. Although the collaboration is primary, there's often a lot of
good-natured competition. It's similar to people telling stories in a
group: everybody wants to be the one telling the best story, but the
overriding goal is that everybody have a good time.

William





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[Michael Feathers]

Post by William Pietri
Thanks for the excellent comparison, Tim. I thought I'd add one minor
thing.

Post by Tim King
Improv only works in a collaborative relationship, not a
competitive one.

Having done some improvisational theater, I think that's not quite
right. Although the collaboration is primary, there's often a lot of
good-natured competition. It's similar to people telling stories in a
group: everybody wants to be the one telling the best story, but the
overriding goal is that everybody have a good time.

I agree. I think competition gets a bum rap. Good natured competition
is fine.

Michael



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[William E Caputo]

<html><body> <FONT face="Default Sans Serif,Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif" size=2><DIV>Tim King:</DIV><DIV>&gt;(great comparison of music and pairing)</DIV><DIV>&nbsp;</DIV><DIV>Thanks&nbsp;for that wonderful comparison Tim, that's a keeper!<BR><BR>Best,<BR>Bill<BR><BR>William E. Caputo<BR>ThoughtWorks, Inc.<BR>http://<A href="http://www.williamcaputo.com" target=blank>www.williamcaputo.com</A><BR>--------<BR>"The user of social software is the group, not the individual." -- Clay Shirky<BR></DIV></FONT>

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[Tim King]

Post by William Pietri

Post by Tim King
Improv only works in a collaborative relationship, not a
competitive one.

Having done some improvisational theater, I think that's not quite
right. Although the collaboration is primary, there's often a lot of
good-natured competition. It's similar to people telling stories in a
group: everybody wants to be the one telling the best story, but the
overriding goal is that everybody have a good time.

That's a good point. I know sometimes if there's a problem that no one
wants to tackle, or even moreso, that my colleagues say can't be solved,
but I see a way to solve it-- Sometimes I feel compelled to outdo my
coworkers. I just want to get down and show them it _can_ be done, and
here's how. This of course usually happens in areas in which I have
strengths, whereas others have other strengths. In any case, this kind
of competitive impulse can't be all bad.

Of course, when we contrast competition and collaboration, we're
referring to the competitive forces described in Peopleware. Maybe we
need to distinguish also two different kinds of compatition: destructive
competition (which impels us to mitigate the other guy's strengths, to
cut each other down) and constructive competition (which impels us to
maximize our own strengths, to build each other up).

Maybe competition gets a bad rap for the same reason criticism gets a
bad rap. There are two kinds of criticism: that which hurts and that
which helps. And in order to be in a team, you have to learn to use the
latter while shunning the former.

-TimK


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[Michael Feathers]

Post by Tim King

Post by William Pietri

Post by Tim King
Improv only works in a collaborative relationship, not a
competitive one.

Having done some improvisational theater, I think that's not quite
right. Although the collaboration is primary, there's often a lot of
good-natured competition. It's similar to people telling stories in a
group: everybody wants to be the one telling the best story, but the
overriding goal is that everybody have a good time.

That's a good point. I know sometimes if there's a problem that no one
wants to tackle, or even moreso, that my colleagues say can't be solved,
but I see a way to solve it-- Sometimes I feel compelled to outdo my
coworkers. I just want to get down and show them it _can_ be done, and
here's how. This of course usually happens in areas in which I have
strengths, whereas others have other strengths. In any case, this kind
of competitive impulse can't be all bad.

Yes. When we compete we get a chance to admire the best in us,
regardless of whether it is ourselves or someone else.

Post by Tim King
Of course, when we contrast competition and collaboration, we're
referring to the competitive forces described in Peopleware. Maybe we
need to distinguish also two different kinds of compatition: destructive
competition (which impels us to mitigate the other guy's strengths, to
cut each other down) and constructive competition (which impels us to
maximize our own strengths, to build each other up).

Yes, I like that distinction. Seems also that competitiveness really
becomes destructive when it springs from low self-esteem and when what
it means to "win" isn't very clear. It seems that sports teams often do
a good job of managing cooperation and competition internally.

Post by Tim King
Maybe competition gets a bad rap for the same reason criticism gets a
bad rap. There are two kinds of criticism: that which hurts and that
which helps. And in order to be in a team, you have to learn to use the
latter while shunning the former.

Yes, I roll my eyes whenever I see movements to shield kids leagues from
competition by not keeping track of score, for instance. I think that
is an overreaction it does a real disservice by conflating healthy and
unhealthy competition. Making competition taboo seems really dangerous
to me. I feel that competition is an innate component of human nature
and if there are ways of working with it rather than pretending it
doesn't exist, then we are all probably better for it.

Michael




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[Doug Swartz]

Post by Kent Beck
Pairing and Personal Space
Personal hygiene and health are important issues when pairing. Cover
your mouth when you cough. Don't come to work when you are sick. Avoid
strong colognes that might affect your partner.

We recently had a situation where a heavy smoker joined the
team. The strong smell of tobacco smoke on the person's
clothes caused a couple of people to have difficulty pairing
with the smoker. We addressed the issue with a discussion, and
Fabreze. I need to check to see if the situation has improved.
--
Doug Swartz
daswartz-***@public.gmane.org



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[Ron Jeffries]

Post by Lowell Lindstrom
Are others seeing or sensing that this is a common problem that
warrants that level of treatment in the pair programming chapter?

I do not see that. What I do perceive is that Kent intends to have those
words in the book. It's his book and whatever his reasons, he gets to say
what's in it. I'm OK with that.

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
Think! -- Aretha Franklin





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[William Pietri]

Post by Ron Jeffries

Post by Lowell Lindstrom
Are others seeing or sensing that this is a common problem that
warrants that level of treatment in the pair programming chapter?

I do not see that.

That's good to know. Those paragraphs made me concerned that it was a
relatively common problem.

Post by Ron Jeffries
What I do perceive is that Kent intends to have those
words in the book. It's his book and whatever his reasons, he gets to say
what's in it. I'm OK with that.

This is true. But I'm having trouble understanding how you meant to
affect the discussion by mentioning this.

William

[Ron Jeffries]

I perceive that his mind is made up and that while we might profitably
discuss the subject, we'll not influence the book's contents in this
regard.

Of course I could be wrong ... about either of those notions. :)

Ron Jeffries
www.XProgramming.com
Will Turner: This is either madness or brilliance.
Captain Jack Sparrow: It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide.

Post by William Pietri

Post by Ron Jeffries
What I do perceive is that Kent intends to have those
words in the book. It's his book and whatever his reasons, he gets to say
what's in it. I'm OK with that.

This is true. But I'm having trouble understanding how you meant to
affect the discussion by mentioning this.

End quotation from William Pietri, on Friday, November 12, 2004, at 2:26:30 PM




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[Michael Feathers]

Post by Ron Jeffries
I perceive that his mind is made up and that while we might profitably
discuss the subject, we'll not influence the book's contents in this
regard.
Of course I could be wrong ... about either of those notions. :)

Isn't it out for printing?

Michael


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[Rachel Davies]

I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings has been
raised in this way - if your workspace is setup properly you really
should not forced into inappropriate physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace is not
well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather small and those
chairs don't look like the kind you would find in a genuine work
environment - they look like conference chairs - is that Ward
Cunningham with a name tag on in the background?
Rachel

Post by Kent Beck
Write all production programs with two people sitting at one machine.
Set up the machine so the partners can sit comfortably side-by-side.
Move the keyboard and mouse back and forth so you are comfortable
while you are typing. Pair programming is a dialog between two people
simultaneously programming (and analyzing and designing and testing)
and trying to program better.
  * Keep each other on task.
  * Brainstorm refinements to the system.
  * Clarify ideas.
  * Take initiative when their partner is stuck, thus lower
frustration.
  * Hold each other accountable to the team’s practices.
Pairing doesn’t mean that you can’t think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. If you need to work on an idea alone, go do
it. Then come back and check in with your team. You can even prototype
alone and still respect pairing. However, this is not an excuse to act
outside of the team. When you’re done exploring bring the resulting
idea, not the code, back to the team. With a partner, you’ll
reimplement it quickly. The results will be more widely understood,
benefitting the project as a whole.
Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers can’t take
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like
that, they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from work. I keep a
bottle of water beside me while I pair. It’s good for my health and
I’m eventually reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me fresh for
the whole day.
Rotate pairs frequently. Some teams report good results obeying a
timer that tells them to shift partners every 60 minutes (every 30
minutes when solving difficult problems). I don’t think I’d like this,
but I haven’t tried it. I like to program with someone new every
couple of hours, switching at natural breaks in development.
Pairing and Personal Space
An issue that has come up and requires comment is the close contact in
pair programming. Different individuals and cultures are comfortable
with different amounts of body space. Pairing with an Italian is
completely different than pairing with a Dane. If you aren’t aware of
the difference it can be acutely uncomfortable. Personal space must be
respected for both parties to work well.
Personal hygiene and health are important issues when pairing. Cover
your mouth when you cough. Don’t come to work when you are sick. Avoid
strong colognes that might affect your partner.
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new experience in
the workplace for some. When programmers aren’t emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a person of the
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in the best
interest of the team. If these feelings arise when pairing, stop
pairing with the person until you have taken responsibility for and
dealt with your feelings. Even if the feelings are mutual, acting on
them will hurt the team. If you want to have an intimate relationship,
one of you should leave the team so you can build a personal
relationship in a personal setting without confusing the team’s
communication with a sexual subtext. Ideally, emotions at work will be
about work.
It is important to respect individual differences when pairing. In
Figure 5 the man has moved closer to the woman than is comfortable for
her. Neither is making his or her best technical decisions at this
point, although they may be completely unaware of the source of their
discomfort.
<image.tiff>
Figure 5: Personal space and pairing
If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team, talk about
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager, or someone
in human resources. If you aren’t comfortable, the team isn’t doing as
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.
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[Doug Swartz]

Post by Rachel Davies
I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings has been
raised in this way - if your workspace is setup properly you really
should not forced into inappropriate physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace is not
well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather small and those
chairs don't look like the kind you would find in a genuine work
environment - they look like conference chairs - is that Ward
Cunningham with a name tag on in the background?
Rachel

Rachel, thanks for your post. It's important to remember
we can certainly set ourselves up in a manner which is more
likely to cause problems. This is perhaps another argument
in favor of dual keyboards and monitors.
--
Doug Swartz
daswartz-***@public.gmane.org



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[Russell Gold]

Post by Doug Swartz

Post by Rachel Davies
I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings has been
raised in this way - if your workspace is setup properly you really
should not forced into inappropriate physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace is not
well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather small and those
chairs don't look like the kind you would find in a genuine work
environment - they look like conference chairs - is that Ward

Rachel, thanks for your post. It's important to remember
we can certainly set ourselves up in a manner which is more
likely to cause problems. This is perhaps another argument
in favor of dual keyboards and monitors.

I don't really like dual keyboard because it seems to lose something
of the feel of "here, you drive" when you physically pass the keyboard
to your partner. On the other hand, I did have a chance to try pairing
in a slightly different setting some years ago. I had large office
with a desk that had a peninsula extension. I found that I could
invite co-workers to pair with me, sitting on the *opposite* side of
the peninsula, with the monitor placed at the end. That way, the
keyboard and mouse could easily be move to a comfortable position for
either of us. It was also the only time that I have pair-programmed
with a woman. It may be that having the peninsula between us avoided
the kind of situation that Kent is describing.


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[Rachel Davies]

As a female programmer I am used to being in the minority but have felt
comfortable pair programming where the environment is set up properly.
If the environment is cramped you are likely to strain your muscles and
eyes trying to pair program - in addition to invading the personal
space of your partner. Convex desks, large monitors and good quality
chairs with arm-rests can create enough space between pairs and still
allow both programmers to see the screen (fig 5 is clearly a poor
quality temporary work environment and so not a good illustration of
normal interactions when pair programming).
The comfortable space needed between pairs depends on the culture as
Kent points out so there is no perfect workspace recipe that will suit
everyone.
Rachel

Post by Russell Gold
..

Post by Doug Swartz
we can certainly set ourselves up in a manner which is more
likely to cause problems. This is perhaps another argument
in favor of dual keyboards and monitors.

I don't really like dual keyboard because it seems to lose something
of the feel of "here, you drive" when you physically pass the keyboard
to your partner. On the other hand, I did have a chance to try pairing
in a slightly different setting some years ago. I had large office
with a desk that had a peninsula extension. I found that I could
invite co-workers to pair with me, sitting on the *opposite* side of
the peninsula, with the monitor placed at the end. That way, the
keyboard and mouse could easily be move to a comfortable position for
either of us. It was also the only time that I have pair-programmed
with a woman. It may be that having the peninsula between us avoided
the kind of situation that Kent is describing.
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[Amir Kolsky]

This discussion sorta gets me thinking that although I have always
stipulated that the two important factors in PP are the chairs and monitors,
perhaps some attention should be given to the tables.

Indeed a convex table (i.e., one with a bulge on either side of which sit
the programmers) seems like the ideal table.

1. The programmers have more personal space.
2. The programmers are both at the same (reflexive) angle to the screen(s).
3. The programmers face each other and have an area between them that is not
cramped by the presence of the monitor.
4. This extra space means that it is easier to have the kbd and mouse
shuttled back and forth.
5. A driving instructor configuration is also easier because of the extra
space (two keyboards, mice).
6. A third person can easily join sitting at the apex of the bulge...
7. It gives me a chance to write six meaningful bullet items.

Any more ideas?

Amir Kolsky
XP& Software

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Sunday, November 14, 2004 1:33 AM
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming
I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings
has been raised in this way - if your workspace is setup
properly you really should not forced into inappropriate
physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace
is not well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather
small and those chairs don't look like the kind you would find
in a genuine work environment - they look like conference
chairs - is that Ward Cunningham with a name tag on in the background?
Rachel

Post by Kent Beck
Write all production programs with two people sitting at one

machine.

Post by Kent Beck
Set up the machine so the partners can sit comfortably side-by-side.
Move the keyboard and mouse back and forth so you are comfortable
while you are typing. Pair programming is a dialog between

two people

Post by Kent Beck
simultaneously programming (and analyzing and designing and testing)
and trying to program better.
  * Keep each other on task.
  * Brainstorm refinements to the system.
  * Clarify ideas.
  * Take initiative when their partner is stuck, thus lower
frustration.
  * Hold each other accountable to the team’s practices.
Pairing doesn’t mean that you can’t think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. If you need to work on an idea

alone, go do

Post by Kent Beck
it. Then come back and check in with your team. You can even

prototype

Post by Kent Beck
alone and still respect pairing. However, this is not an

excuse to act

Post by Kent Beck
outside of the team. When you’re done exploring bring the resulting
idea, not the code, back to the team. With a partner, you’ll
reimplement it quickly. The results will be more widely understood,
benefitting the project as a whole.
Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers

can’t take

Post by Kent Beck
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like
that, they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from work. I keep a
bottle of water beside me while I pair. It’s good for my health and
I’m eventually reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me

fresh for

Post by Kent Beck
the whole day.
Rotate pairs frequently. Some teams report good results obeying a
timer that tells them to shift partners every 60 minutes (every 30
minutes when solving difficult problems). I don’t think I’d

like this,

Post by Kent Beck
but I haven’t tried it. I like to program with someone new every
couple of hours, switching at natural breaks in development.
Pairing and Personal Space
An issue that has come up and requires comment is the close

contact in

Post by Kent Beck
pair programming. Different individuals and cultures are comfortable
with different amounts of body space. Pairing with an Italian is
completely different than pairing with a Dane. If you aren’t

aware of

Post by Kent Beck
the difference it can be acutely uncomfortable. Personal

space must be

Post by Kent Beck
respected for both parties to work well.
Personal hygiene and health are important issues when pairing. Cover
your mouth when you cough. Don’t come to work when you are

sick. Avoid

Post by Kent Beck
strong colognes that might affect your partner.
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new

experience in

Post by Kent Beck
the workplace for some. When programmers aren’t emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a

person of the

Post by Kent Beck
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in

the best

Post by Kent Beck
interest of the team. If these feelings arise when pairing, stop
pairing with the person until you have taken responsibility for and
dealt with your feelings. Even if the feelings are mutual, acting on
them will hurt the team. If you want to have an intimate

relationship,

Post by Kent Beck
one of you should leave the team so you can build a personal
relationship in a personal setting without confusing the team’s
communication with a sexual subtext. Ideally, emotions at

work will be

Post by Kent Beck
about work.
It is important to respect individual differences when pairing. In
Figure 5 the man has moved closer to the woman than is

comfortable for

Post by Kent Beck
her. Neither is making his or her best technical decisions at this
point, although they may be completely unaware of the source

of their

Post by Kent Beck
discomfort.
<image.tiff>
Figure 5: Personal space and pairing
If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team,

talk about

Post by Kent Beck
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager, or someone
in human resources. If you aren’t comfortable, the team

isn’t doing as

Post by Kent Beck
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.
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Post by Kent Beck
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[Kent Beck]

Amir,

I have a convex table that an XP-applying company had custom built in
Denmark. It separates me from my partner more than I am comfortable with. I
can work at it just fine, though. As a bonus, three people can comfortably
work around one monitor at this table, which comes in handy when clients
come to my office here.

Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Sunday, November 14, 2004 3:46 PM
Subject: RE: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming
This discussion sorta gets me thinking that although I have
always stipulated that the two important factors in PP are
the chairs and monitors, perhaps some attention should be
given to the tables.
Indeed a convex table (i.e., one with a bulge on either side
of which sit the programmers) seems like the ideal table.
1. The programmers have more personal space.
2. The programmers are both at the same (reflexive) angle to
the screen(s). 3. The programmers face each other and have an
area between them that is not cramped by the presence of the
monitor. 4. This extra space means that it is easier to have
the kbd and mouse shuttled back and forth. 5. A driving
instructor configuration is also easier because of the extra
space (two keyboards, mice). 6. A third person can easily
join sitting at the apex of the bulge... 7. It gives me a
chance to write six meaningful bullet items.
Any more ideas?
Amir Kolsky
XP& Software

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Sunday, November 14, 2004 1:33 AM
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming
I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings
has been raised in this way - if your workspace is setup
properly you really should not forced into inappropriate
physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace
is not well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather
small and those chairs don't look like the kind you would find
in a genuine work environment - they look like conference
chairs - is that Ward Cunningham with a name tag on in the

background?

Rachel

Post by Kent Beck
Write all production programs with two people sitting at one

machine.

Post by Kent Beck
Set up the machine so the partners can sit comfortably

side-by-side.

Post by Kent Beck
Move the keyboard and mouse back and forth so you are comfortable
while you are typing. Pair programming is a dialog between

two people

Post by Kent Beck
simultaneously programming (and analyzing and designing

and testing)

Post by Kent Beck
and trying to program better.
  * Keep each other on task.
  * Brainstorm refinements to the system.
  * Clarify ideas.
  * Take initiative when their partner is stuck, thus lower
frustration.
  * Hold each other accountable to the team’s practices.
Pairing doesn’t mean that you can’t think alone. People need both
companionship and privacy. If you need to work on an idea

alone, go do

Post by Kent Beck
it. Then come back and check in with your team. You can even

prototype

Post by Kent Beck
alone and still respect pairing. However, this is not an

excuse to act

Post by Kent Beck
outside of the team. When you’re done exploring bring the resulting
idea, not the code, back to the team. With a partner, you’ll
reimplement it quickly. The results will be more widely

understood,

Post by Kent Beck
benefitting the project as a whole.
Pair programming is tiring but satisfying. Most programmers

can’t take

Post by Kent Beck
more than five or six hours of pairing in a day. After a week like
that, they are ready for a relaxing weekend away from

work. I keep a

Post by Kent Beck
bottle of water beside me while I pair. It’s good for my

health and

Post by Kent Beck
I’m eventually reminded to take a break. The breaks keep me

fresh for

Post by Kent Beck
the whole day.
Rotate pairs frequently. Some teams report good results obeying a
timer that tells them to shift partners every 60 minutes (every 30
minutes when solving difficult problems). I don’t think I’d

like this,

Post by Kent Beck
but I haven’t tried it. I like to program with someone new every
couple of hours, switching at natural breaks in development.
Pairing and Personal Space
An issue that has come up and requires comment is the close

contact in

Post by Kent Beck
pair programming. Different individuals and cultures are

comfortable

Post by Kent Beck
with different amounts of body space. Pairing with an Italian is
completely different than pairing with a Dane. If you aren’t

aware of

Post by Kent Beck
the difference it can be acutely uncomfortable. Personal

space must be

Post by Kent Beck
respected for both parties to work well.
Personal hygiene and health are important issues when

pairing. Cover

Post by Kent Beck
your mouth when you cough. Don’t come to work when you are

sick. Avoid

Post by Kent Beck
strong colognes that might affect your partner.
Working effectively together feels good. It may be a new

experience in

Post by Kent Beck
the workplace for some. When programmers aren’t emotionally mature
enough to separate approval from arousal, working with a

person of the

Post by Kent Beck
opposite gender can bring up sexual feelings that are not in

the best

Post by Kent Beck
interest of the team. If these feelings arise when pairing, stop
pairing with the person until you have taken

responsibility for and

Post by Kent Beck
dealt with your feelings. Even if the feelings are mutual,

acting on

Post by Kent Beck
them will hurt the team. If you want to have an intimate

relationship,

Post by Kent Beck
one of you should leave the team so you can build a personal
relationship in a personal setting without confusing the team’s
communication with a sexual subtext. Ideally, emotions at

work will be

Post by Kent Beck
about work.
It is important to respect individual differences when pairing. In
Figure 5 the man has moved closer to the woman than is

comfortable for

Post by Kent Beck
her. Neither is making his or her best technical decisions at this
point, although they may be completely unaware of the source

of their

Post by Kent Beck
discomfort.
<image.tiff>
Figure 5: Personal space and pairing
If you are uncomfortable pairing with someone on the team,

talk about

Post by Kent Beck
it with someone safe; a respected team member, a manager,

or someone

Post by Kent Beck
in human resources. If you aren’t comfortable, the team

isn’t doing as

Post by Kent Beck
well as it could. And chances are others are uncomfortable too.
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Post by Kent Beck
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[Kent Beck]

I don't think physical contact is the issue. There are many cases of
inappropriate feelings in the workplace without any contact (e.g. Bridget
Jones' Diary). You are right, though, that the monitor and chairs are not
the best available. And yes, that is Ward.

Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
Sent: Saturday, November 13, 2004 3:33 PM
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Practice: Pair Programming
I must admit I am surprised that the issue of sexual feelings
has been
raised in this way - if your workspace is setup properly you really
should not forced into inappropriate physical contact when pairing.
Perhaps in Fig 5 the man moved too close because the workspace is not
well set up for pair programming? The monitor is rather small
and those
chairs don't look like the kind you would find in a genuine work
environment - they look like conference chairs - is that Ward
Cunningham with a name tag on in the background?
Rachel

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[olibye]

I've uploaded some pictures of the desks we constructed for
WirelessDataServices.

L shaped desks are good for individuals, but bad for pairs. So we just
used conference ends on the end of each L.

"WDS Pairing Station" shows the desks just after building.
There are three machines.
- 1 in foreground is a beefy twin processor, only used for pairing,
with big 21 inch screen in the centre of the conference end so you can
rotate it completely around to one of the "personal areas".
- 2 personal machines everything else.
- Chairs on wheels, so you can whizz about easily.

"BigScreensConvexDeskEnds"
- Big screens are great. One big screen gives you better resolution
that multiple screens. It also means you can turn it.
- Notice the speakers. Funky build loud noises are import for deciing
winners of integration races!
- Notice the Kookaburra release token on the next desk along. Only
people with the bird can release.

"DedicatedPairingMachines"
- 6 dedicated layouts.
- before we made another 12 of them down stairs!
- All the personal stuff is on the personal desks. Pairing desks just
have drinks
- Machine at the back by the door, is the build machine (other 2 build
machines are in other time zones with the teams in Singapore and
Seattle).





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[Michael Feathers]

Post by Ron Jeffries
William,
When I write a book about XP, I do represent XP. I accept responsibility
when I accept readers' money. When I talk on the web I am still
accountable
for the things I say. People consider the source of material they read or
hear. I want to be a reliable source of useful information.
I try to take the task of communication seriously because I want to
communicate as clearly as I can. I want to speak clearly and directly from
my heart (a task that alas eludes me much of the time). I want to speak
about topics that I feel strongly about. I think that inappropriate
feelings, when they arise, are a serious problem for teams. I have seen it
happen often enough that I think I should write about it. The private
messages I've received about the topic confirm this observation.

We've probably beaten this one to death, but I just have to say that
your use of the phrase "inappropriate feelings" makes me flinch. I
don't consider myself to be in control of my feelings. They happen, and
I can acknowledge them or not, or act on them or not. I've pretty much
assumed that that is the way it is for most people. Beyond that there
is the question of whether a person's feelings are their private affair
as long as they don't impact the team. Are we aware of all of the
feelings that our team members have? We can read body language, but do
we know? Is it our business?

I'm leery of any enterprise which decides what feelings are appropriate
or inappropriate. It seems like an invasion of privacy and something
somewhat beyond the work contact. I wish your phraseology was tied to
action rather than feeling.

Michael Feathers




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[Kent Beck]

I am afraid of heights. Especially when I'm stressed, going up in a glass
elevator is cause for total terror on my part. My emotions are real.
However, they are not "appropriate" in the sense I am using the term,
because they do not match the reality of the situation. I'm perfectly safe
in the elevator. There is no objective reason for any distress, much less
abject terror.

I don't think sexual feelings in the workplace are "appropriate" in the same
sense. It's not a quiet, candlelit dinner or a cozy car overlooking the
lights of the city, it's work. If I get aroused when I sit down to program
with a person of my preferred gender, it makes no more objective sense than
my terror in an elevator. My feelings don't match the situation.

As for being in control of feelings, I think we all influence our feelings.
If I'm feeling down, there are things I can do to help myself feel better.
I'm certainly responsible for my feelings and their effects on others. And I
observe that sexual feelings in the workplace hinder the work of the team.

That said, I have gotten several messages that boil down to, "I like feeling
aroused sitting next to a programming partner and it's none of your
business." I agree that it is none of my business how they feel or what they
do. I will continue, however, to point out what I perceive to be the
consequences of indulging those feelings. If they want to be aroused at work
more than they want the team to work its best, they are free to make that
choice and deal with what comes next.

Kent Beck
Three Rivers Institute

-----Original Message-----
From: Michael Feathers [mailto:mfeathers-***@public.gmane.org]
Sent: Wednesday, December 15, 2004 5:31 PM
To: xpbookdiscussiongroup-***@public.gmane.org
Subject: Re: [xpe2e] Re: Overstepping Qualifications [was: Practice:
PairProgramming, Sex, etc]

We've probably beaten this one to death, but I just have to say that
your use of the phrase "inappropriate feelings" makes me flinch. I
don't consider myself to be in control of my feelings. They happen, and
I can acknowledge them or not, or act on them or not. I've pretty much
assumed that that is the way it is for most people. Beyond that there
is the question of whether a person's feelings are their private affair
as long as they don't impact the team. Are we aware of all of the
feelings that our team members have? We can read body language, but do
we know? Is it our business?

I'm leery of any enterprise which decides what feelings are appropriate
or inappropriate. It seems like an invasion of privacy and something
somewhat beyond the work contact. I wish your phraseology was tied to
action rather than feeling.

Michael Feathers






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